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Thank you mellyjelly/drumthings for this fantabulous skin=D

Maybe Tonight, Maybe Tomorrow

I heard the news today. It came out of nowhere.
I wish I could run away,
but where would I go?
Is this my destiny? Something so unfair... What will become of me?
God only knows.

And they say the road to heaven might lead us back through hell.
Maybe tonight, maybe tomorrow, we will win this fight and bury this sorrow.
We're so alive, still holding on, not ready to die, so we LIVESTRONG.

My pride is left for dead, as my world gets shaken.
The thoughts inside my head are so hard to control.
I am staring down the unknown, but one thing is certain.
You could break my body, but you will never break my soul.

And they say the road to heaven might leads us back through hell, but we're holding on for more
than stories to tell.

Maybe tonight, maybe tomorrow, we will win this fight and bury this sorrow.
We're so alive, still holding on, not ready to die, so we LIVESTRONG

my watch for OBS--Amundsen

amirul
pak meng
desmond
soo hao
ivy
zhen wei
min thu
grace
lynette
melanie
joseph
shairul
jocelyn
praba
cherie
ME!
and our instructor jonathan yung!

nth much happened today.

i dunno how to describe how i felt.just some speechlessness swept over me.

no more conversations.

how would u feel if the one u loved left you?

and nv return to u even as a fren?

who doesnt bother to acknowledge ur presence?

who cares more of others than wad used to be u?

why did all this happen to me?

and isnt it hurting me enough to think wad i had gone thru?

does love and life revolve only around bad things?

or is there a better side to it?

people see me as jus a normal person?

and y m i saying all this as tho i suffer from psychological trauma?

did u not feel bad the first time?

must things be repeated until learnt?

when did the sorry's mean anything to u?

i m just not showin my feelings cos i doubt its worth it since its over...

----------------------------------------------------lack of understanding


i m starting to see the true colors of even the people who are close to me. for wad reason i dunno.

is there any point living in self-denial when u noe the truth?

when wil this ever end?

when will the hurt i hav been enduring ever be numb to me?

how this started and ended was really a fairytale

one moment happy, another sad

is that wad rships are abt?

totally zero or rather negative communication btw two parties

the failure to recognise the presence of the other party.

the 'ignorance is bliss' attitude

when will this ever end? God, please tell me....

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

living strong is no longer a term in my vocabulary with all this happening.

wads the point in me living if things are goin the way they are nw

and never ever recovering for the better but rather deteriorate for the worst?

-----------------------dejected
-----------------disappointed
---------------crestfallen
----------disheartened
------------crushed
-wads left of me
now?

back from OBS.had a great time wif Amundsen watch =)
i shall blog another time abt them.
it was not as great as opc but still, a life-enriching experience to ave sheer camaraderie wif ppl i dun even noe.

i will be goin for obs tml.so wont be bloggin.all the best for everythin.havent been feelin well lately, gotta go baq to sch almost everyday.n some emotional and psychological prob of mine tt i think too much until i start 'hallucinating'.its not a nice feeling.but there's nth i can do to turn baq time.i did so much and it ended lyk tt.who to blame??no one but me

anyhow, i choose and do my best not to get so caught up and affected by it cos ITS ALREADY OVER!!

i learnt from my tuition tcher not to be too quick in judging someone unless you have been in the exact same situation as that person. we did EUTHANASIA(MERCY KILLING) yday.i was quite tempted at trying it, sounded so cool...killing myself with permission.BUT NO, THATS NOT THE WAY TO LIVE, WE CANT PLAY GOD RITE?

so, drinking a water with dissolved potassium cyanide isnt the way to go. just go out there, have lots of fun and do things you nv thought you could and live your life to the fullest, thats wad i believe.i hope that aft my o levels i could be in lifeskills and touch the lives of many.

"dont teach for the holidays, teach because you have the passion to touch lives" ~Ms Nah

"it's a simple choice...do nothing or have an adventure!" ~OPC quote

how true..

haiz.

The Invitation
by Oriahe Mountain Dreamer


It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.
It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring the moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your sorrow, have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed for fear of further pain.
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself, if you can bear accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul.
I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore be trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty even when it is not pretty everyday, and if you can source your life from it's presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver of the full moon...YES!
It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done for the children.
It doesn't interest me who you are or how you came to be here. I want to know if you can stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.
It doesn't interest me what or where or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.
I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in empty moments.

The Rules of Being Human

You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for as long as you live. How you take care of it or fail to take care of it can make an enormous difference in the quality of your life.
You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time, informal school called Life. Each day, you will be presented with opportunities to learn what you need to know. The lessons presented are often completely different from those you think you need.
There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial, error and experimentation. You can learn as much from failure as you can from success. Maybe more.
A lesson is repeated until it is learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it (as evidenced by a change in your attitude and ultimately your behavior) then you can go on to the next lesson.
Learning lessons does not end. There is no stage of life that does not contain some lessons. As long as you live there will be something more to learn.
"There" is no better than "here". When your "there" has become a "here" you will simply discover another 'there' that will again look better than your 'here.' Don't be fooled by believing that the unattainable is better than what you have.
Others are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects something you love or hate about yourself. When tempted to criticize others, ask yourself why you feel so strongly.
What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you create with those tools and resources is up to you. Remember that through desire, goal setting and unflagging effort you can have anything you want. Persistence is the key to success.
The answers lie inside of you. The solutions to all of life's problems lie within your grasp. All you need to do is ask, look, listen and trust yourself.

http://westhartfordcounselingcenter.com/index.html

Life Lessons

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
I've learned that no matter how much I care some people just don't care back.
I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
I've learned that it's not what you have in your life, but whom you have in your life that counts.
I've learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
I've learned that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
I've learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I've learned that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.
I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I've learned that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And, just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.
I've learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.
I've learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt, and you will hurt in the process.
I've learned that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.
I've learned that heroes are people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
I've learned that you can keep going long after you can't.

http://westhartfordcounselingcenter.com/index.html

i will be bloggin some stuff for the nx few days before my obs training.
my holidays are so packed, gotta go sch every single dae

the following songs are dedicated to the person who was once my dearest..

Come What May
Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to vanish inside your kiss
Every day I love you more and more
Listen to my heart, can you hear it sings
Come back to me, and forgive everything
Seasons may change, winter to spring
But I love you until the end of time

[Chorus:]
Come what may
Come what may
I will love you until my dying day

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
It all revolves around you
And there's no mountain too high
No river too wide
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
Storm clouds may gather
And stars may collide
But I love you until the end of time

[Chorus]

Oh, come what may, come what may
I will love you, I will love you
Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place

[Chorus]

The flame

Another night slowly closes in,
And I feel so lonely.
Touching heat freezing on my skin,
I pretend you still hold me.
I'm going crazy, I'm losing sleep.
I'm in too far, I'm in way too deep over you.
I can't believe you're gone.
You were the first, you'll be the last.

Wherever you go, Ill be with you.
Whatever you want, Ill give it to you.
Whenever you need someone to lay your heart and head upon.
Remember: after the fire, after all the rain,
I will be the flame.
I will be the flame.

Watching shadows move across the wall,
I feel so frightened.
I wanna run to you, I wanna call,
But Ive been hit by lightening.
Just cant stand up for fallin apart.
Can't see through this veil across my heart, over you.
Youll always be the one.
You were the first, you'll be the last.

Wherever you go, I'll be with you.
Whatever you want, Ill give it to you.
Whenever you need someone to lay your heart and head upon.
Remember: after the fire, after all the rain,
I will be the flame.
I will be the flame.

I'm going crazy, I'm losing sleep.
I'm in too far, I'm in way too deep over you.
You'll always be the one.
You were the first, you'll be the last.

Wherever you go, I'll be with you.
Whatever you want, I'll give it to you.
Whenever you need someone to lay your heart and head upon.
Remember: after the fire, after all the rain,
I will be the flame.
I will be the flame.

Whatever you want, I'll give it to you.
Wherever you go, I'll be with you.
And whatever you want, I'll give it to you.






---------------its over